There is an old antisemitic lie that goes as follows: Judaism is all about law, not love – it’s harsh, legalistic, nitpicky.
But if you actually bother to study Jewish law, you’ll discover that the exact opposite is true: Jewish law is the mechanism by which we set the bar for love – and that bar is breathtakingly high.
Here’s an example: If you enter a store and have no intention of buying anything, don’t ask an employee the price of any item. Doing so wastes their time and falsely raises their hopes that you’ll purchase something. You’re basically using that person for your own entertainment, which is unkind and unfair.
One could argue that this is “legalistic” and “nitpicky.” Why come up with a rule for such a specific situation? Isn’t it enough to say “treat workers kindly”? But that argument misses the purpose of this approach which is to cultivate a certain sensibility – to teach us to really see the people before us, in all their dignity, humanity, and specificity. Jewish law pushes us to put ourselves in other people’s shoes, to imagine how this particular person in this particular situation might feel if I do this particular thing.
Again, it’s a high bar. But in striving to meet it, we become kinder, more sensitive, and yes, more loving human beings.
Sarah Hurwitz is the Author of Here All Along: Finding Meaning, Spirituality, and a Deeper Connection to Life — In Judaism (After Finally Choosing to Look There). She was head speechwriter for First Lady Michelle Obama. sarahhurwitz.net
For Every Jewel There is a Question:
In who’s shoes do you walk?
