I was moved to read the beautiful piece on aging by the lovely and talented Judith light. [Read it HERE] Her description of aging as “surrendering” got me thinking about aging, a topic I studiously avoid.
As I “grow up”, I realize more and more that “surrender” is not resignation and defeat, but, rather it is the act of abandoning the immature ideas and ideals of youth for the “old”, “tried and true” ideals of our ancestors and their traditions. Surrender, in fact, is “joining with the winners”. At best, we age gracefully by perceiving “…the events at the end of time with exultant certainty,…. by surrender of selfish pettiness and by consecration to the great destiny of life…”
Making offerings, being of service and supporting the most vulnerable in our society are the ideas and ideals that emerge as we surrender the selfish “me first” desires that Torah teaches are an “evil” that is residue from youth
As we age, it seems we become caricatures of our selves: our essence is distorted as our most prominent features become inflated. The parts of us that stood out the most, our core character traits are wildly exaggerated. Our faces become the canvas of our inner selves – Sometimes funny, sometimes ugly, sometimes beautiful.
Last October, Judith Light had a caricature unveiled at Sardis (http://www.judithlight.com/). A beautiful reflection of the woman she has surrendered to being: Clear, bright, focused and serious eyes, set upon a sweet face with a light smile.
Elul as a messenger, tells us it is time to once again look at our character traits and re-commit to expressing our real essence, to connecting the pure soul within. By engaging in acts of justice and loving-kindness we participate in the “art” of aging with grace and with beauty.
1 Joseph B. Soloveitchik, Confrontation from Tradition: A Journal of Orthodox Thought, 1964 volume 6, #2 2 Genesis 8:21 Gregory Metzger is a co-leader of Kihilanu, a new and exciting independent minyan. He teaches T’shuvah, Torah and Tefillah to inmates of seven jails and five prisons in California. He is a rabbinical student at AJR-CA.
3 Responses
Mr. Metzger,
I can’t express to you the emulation that warms over me as I read about you. You are truly an inspiration and personify the Jewish neshama.
Thank you,
Jacob Schwartz
As always, Greg brings a depth of insight and Torah perspective into everything he writes. What important ideas to focus on during ELUL.
I am 60 years old, soon to be 61. The clarity you mention in Judith Light and her work is something that is gaining in me as well. I can feel it, and I can feel myself becoming more transparent, or somehow shrinking into a smaller space now, making room for others in a way that is new for me. Honestly, I believe we are caricatures in our youth, and only as we age do we morph into the shape of our true selves. That is how I am experiencing it anyway. It is not about our physical features changing, it is about fitting gracefully into our eternal souls, at long last. Your post inspired these thoughts, Gregory!